“abandon finesse & sweat
revolt paying double for life
or occupying corners like unwanted dining room tables
needing coupons”
Tag Archives: women poets
for the love of poetry, Here’s: Jaha Zainabu
for the love of poetry, Here’s: Jolivette “The Poet Warrior” Anderson
She Chronicles presents: Joylissa LeFleur
New School
Sex education for me and many young black girls in the 1980s consisted of shallow, scary, guilt-laden directives on what to and (especially) not to do. From the women in my family I learned, 1. Keep your skirt down and your panties up. 2. Good girls don’t… (do anything related to sex with men, definitely not with women, and especially not with yourself). 3. All men want is sex. The only thing my father ever said regarding sex was, “Ain’t no abortions in this house”. From school I learned that if I insisted on being a wild, unruly, teenager and having sex, absolutely use condoms because unprotected sex causes pregnancy and nasty diseases that itch, burn, stink and cause sores. Finally, from the church I learned that my body is solely for my husband’s pleasure when making babies and premarital sex will certainly send me straight to hell.
To say old school sex education was less than comprehensive is an understatement. Additionally, girls’ education was drastically different from, and often in direct opposition to, boys’. While girls were taught to guard and value virginity at all costs, boys were often encouraged prove their prowess by having sex with multiple girls and women before, during and after marriage. Girls were given chastisements for chastity. Boys were given condoms and told, “Just don’t bring home no babies”.
In addition to being inaccurate and contradictory, these lessons lacked information on anatomy (female and male), autonomy, consent, sexual assault (particularly by acquaintances and family), the reproductive process, and pleasure. How do you talk about sex and not talk about pleasure?
Not only was the teaching incomplete, it was physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually dangerous, proving detrimental to girls’ development into holistically sound women. Hence, the staggering number of sexual assault survivors who have come forward during the rise of #MeToo is not surprising given society’s, especially women’s, poor sex education. Sadder still is that as bad as the sex education of the 1980’s was, for previous generations it was worse. Basically, our parents didn’t teach us better because they didn’t know any better.
But better knowledge is widely available now. And those who know better must do better and teach others so they can do better as well. We must uproot the culture of sexual guilt, shame, oppression, repression, silence, toxic masculinity and rape that has grown from the seeds of miseducation and flourished under sexist and patriarchal reign and rain. Simultaneously, we must sow new seeds of equality, respect, honesty, trust and communication to cultivate a new society free from sexual violence.
In teaching we must continue learning, to avoid inadvertently imparting obsolete and therefore erroneous information to those trying to learn. Education, like sexuality, is fluid: it can change over time. We must be prepared to adapt. And now that we know what we must do, let’s begin. The bell is ringing. School is back in session.
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Joylissa LeFleur
A perpetual conundrum with a purple pen, Joylissa LeFleur is a sexy black woman storyteller spreading love on this ball called earth one laptop keystroke at a time. A morally upstanding member of humanity, she is not above being bribed with beach trips, books, or stimulating conversations over popcorn and spirits.
Contact Joy at getloveandjoy@gmail.com and check out her musings at
She Chronicles presents: MLuv
I AM
I AM a BLACK WOMAN
I AM Beautiful.
I AM Complex.
I AM
Weirdly wonderful, wildly tamed, comically entertaining and cosmically unchained, with a free spirit like a masterpiece unframed!
Predictably Unpredictable
I AM
The sum total of my mother and my father… a fine mixture of my past, present and future.
I just AM!
Growing, Expanding, Learning, Experiencing, BEing,
Rightly mysterious and yet pleasingly transparent.
Acceptance brings Peace and Peace brings Clarity.
Thru my minds eye is a Vista an Unobstructed view so
I can see both right in front of me
And miles behind.
I see YOU coming … And if YOU don’t vibe right
I don’t mind seeing YOU going.
I don’t claim to nor aim to be perfect.
I AM what I AM!
When the time presents the opportunity for me to BE
What I AM to BE next …
I will BE that …PERFECTLY, IMPERFECT and on time!
Meanwhile…
See, I AM like YOU SISTA.
WE ARE
Beautiful!
WE ARE
Complex!
WE ARE…Weirdly Wonderful,
Wildly Tamed,
Comically Entertaining
and Cosmically Unchained, with a free spirit like a masterpiece Unframed!
Predictably Unpredictable…
WE ARE WOMEN!
________________________________________________________________________________________
MLUV (pronounced Em Love)is a Radio Personality, Writer, Motivational Speaker, Event Host and Poet. She is the Host of her own weekly online Talk Radio Program/Podcast on the IBNXRadio.COM Network called “LiveLifeInThePURPLE with MLUV.” Committed to spreading positive vibes and encouraging all who tune in. “The Purple” is a poetic way of communicating the message that life is better when our thoughts, motivation and intentions are rooted in positive thinking. Inspired by research on the colors in the rainbow that revealed that of all the millions of colors in the rainbow, the ones that had the highest measured frequency were the violet spectrum, of which purple is a part. Hence, Live Life in The PURPLE. MLUV uses her show as a platform to give support to Entrepreneurs, Musical Artists and is a voice in the Mental Health Community. She aligns with people in the community who are serving those who suffer and interviews and promotes those who are sharing their light and love. She is a Social Activist and actively supports Local charitable efforts aimed at protecting Women and Children as well as Sexual Abuse, Human Sex Trafficking and Suicide Prevention and Homelessness and Recovery.
Current Projects- CEO and Founder of Purple Door Creations, LLC and www.R2isetheatre.org troupe member. Her first book of Poetry entitled “Thoughts From A PURPLE MIND”, The Poetry Of MLUV is in production.
Her debut CD is out on Bandcamp and available for digital download. Search for “MLUV” or “Sounds From A PURPLE Mind”.
Mantra: “POSITIVITY, ITS A MOVEMENT BABY!”
Join the Purple Movement and listen to LiveLifeInThePURPLE with MLuV on IBNXRADIO.com
Email: Mluv@purpledoorcreations.com
iHeartRadio- Live Life In The Purple
FB: MluvWall
IG:MluvWall & livelifeinthepurple
Twitter: llitp
“Expect Nothing” by Alice Walker
– Alice Walker—–HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
for the love of poetry, Here’s Staceyann Chin
for the love of poetry, Here’s Rita Dove
for the love of poetry, Here’s: Jolivette “The Poet Warrior” Anderson
for the love of poetry, Here’s: Jaha Zainabu
Nikki Skies 