If I could take a moment and tell you how I still hated me after the
nights of building / and black power audio tapes
maybe you’ll understand
why I anchored your blues / and never questioned your intelligence.
Allow me to explain how being fitted your friend
meant cooking link sausages to connect us with nothing more than / flesh&bones
Ascension not attainable to neither one of us who recognized and loved
a good argument
some hot gossip.
My cotton pillow ironically enslaved my thoughts on what could have / should have
been said sorry
I stepped from the ship to walk the land. Girlfriends
I don’t even have the words to tell you how life changing my move from Los Angeles to Atlanta to take on five children has been. There are few words outside of: therapist, alcohol, sleep, arguments and crying that I can think of. Every molecule in my body is different from five years ago. My art will eventually reap the benefit (at least that is what everyone keeps telling me!) But what about my social life?
See, even though I now have children I technically don’t qualify to hang out with my married friends. And because I now have children I can’t quantify hanging out with my single friends. Well, how do I meet people outside of my artsy world? After epic fails with friends of friends and long distance friends, I tried speed dating.
Personally, it was one of the most exhausting experiences in my life. First of all, my friend who agreed to come with me bailed out so I flew solo! And how was I to know it was some popular basketball weekend and the ones that showed up would be nerds! Mercy… chile…
I am one for good conversation with anyone. Warm and connecting conversation will begin to change the appearance of almost anyone. (almost I said) I met one of each nationality! Indian, Asian, Caucasian, Latin, African American… they all at one point in the evening sat next to me and began conversation. Well most of them, one guy had NO game or conversation and showed me pictures from his cellphone and had me guess the places. What?! The LONGEST FIVE MINUTES OF MY LIFE YA’ HEARD ME?!
I did have two great conversations and the time went by too fast with the Indian man and a Caucasian man. I am who I am, I like what I like and that order would be “black with NO cream.” I chose no one.
But hey, I tried it. speed dating.
We have to take back the trees.
Arouse the hyenas to distract the thunder so we can scratch our backs on the blades of grass.
Rub baby powder on the chest of slumber so they can dream pure. Denounce titles and all this other foolery you have adopted to be our family structure.
That silence is not mine! I am the threatening crashes of waves you belittled to sand. Because… because I believed them too. I bought the lemonade recipes and choreographed a dance to sour times. Framed my “S” shirt for company to count the stripes I’ve endured and marvel at brown brave. Outside of ourselves we have once again been led to puppetry. And I hate you too.
This is not us. There is no book. Only 81 of those songs are ours. Come unprepared with bread so we can dip away the excess. It is me. Re-member…
Listen to him no more. Let her voice be of distant space. We have to take back the trees, we have to take back the trees.