Tag Archives: dating

love marks the spot

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I spilled my heart here.

and in gym during 6th hour.
and in the parking lot of Dairy Queen.
and on the phone when long distance calling cost extra.
and I meant every word I said.

and for you I’d do it again.
for your smile.
for your time.
for the exchange of our secrets.

in the name of love.

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i tried it. speed dating.

I don’t even have the words to tell you how life changing my move from Los Angeles to Atlanta to take on five children has been.  There are few words outside of: therapist, alcohol, sleep, arguments and crying that I can think of.  Every molecule in my body is different from five years ago.  My art will eventually reap the benefit (at least that is what everyone keeps telling me!)  But what about my social life?

See, even though I now have children I technically don’t qualify to hang out with my married friends.  And because I now have children I can’t quantify hanging out with my single friends.  Well, how do I meet people outside of my artsy world?  After epic fails with friends of friends and long distance friends, I tried speed dating.

Personally, it was one of the most exhausting experiences in my life.  First of all, my friend who agreed to come with me bailed out so I flew solo!  And how was I to know it was some popular basketball weekend and the ones that showed up would be nerds!  Mercy… chile…

I am one for good conversation with anyone.  Warm and connecting conversation will begin to change the appearance of almost anyone. (almost I said)  I met one of each nationality!  Indian, Asian, Caucasian, Latin, African American… they all at one point in the evening sat next to me and began conversation.  Well most of them, one guy had NO game or conversation and showed me pictures from his cellphone and had me guess the places.  What?! The LONGEST FIVE MINUTES OF MY LIFE YA’ HEARD ME?!

I did have two great conversations and the time went by too fast with the Indian man and a Caucasian man.  I am who I am, I like what I like and that order would be “black with NO cream.”  I chose no one.

But hey, I tried it. speed dating.

Breath and Sacrifice

Sunday – Wash clothes, wash hair, braid hair

Monday – Math Tutor

Tuesday  – West African Dance Class and Soccer Practice

Wednesday

Thursday – West African Dance Class and Soccer Practice

Friday

Saturday – Soccer Games

         pray.dream.hope.want.pray.laugh.dream.cry.yearn…  all fall in between the other days. 

 It has been four years since I took custody of my sisters children and moved my life from LA to ATL.  Right now I’m too exhausted to detail the differences between the two lifestyles, but they exist.  Dramatically. 

Where do I begin?  I am new everyday with challenges, fears and faith.  The boys are 19 and 14 and the girls 10, 7 and 6.  When I speak of becoming new, I am writing the dances of what to wear, how to speak, what’s the tone all in the note of love.  Love and care for them and where do I find the unselfish part of this parenting position.  They all made honor roll, made the traveling squad for dance and the traveling team for soccer… not too shabby for a chic who is an independent artist.  A chic who went from 0 kids to 5 kids in 32 hours of driving.

 Sacrifice has always been my breath as an artist.  For the love of receiving the stories and words, silence and solitude was the recipe.  I always dated and loved but a perfectionist at remaining detached was my sacrifice.  Not just mine, not a new decision and not even conscious… something that just was.  Now my sacrifice is the children and they are my breath.

             I miss my art.  I miss my muse.  Send her to me.  Tell her,  I am available June 16th…  

SUMMER TIME and the kids are gone for four weeks!  I made a SUMMER BUCKET LIST and plan to become selfish and hear myself talk again!

 I look forward to writing and growing as My person.  As an artist.  And becoming a better Aunt for my nieces and nephews when they return. 

 I haven’t been this excited about school being out since my junior year in high school!

Sunday – me

Monday – me

Tuesday – me

Wednesday – me again

Thursday – guess who? me

Friday – yep, me!

Saturday – If  I’m happy, everyone in my house will be, so… ME