Mind Mob

Years ago, when I began to read about the ancient African science of yoga and study Buddhism, there were exercises I practiced to silence my inner chatter.  I remember two of these exercises specifically.  One being to smile at everyone I come in contact with and the other was to give compliments.  I remember being hesitant on doing these because I didn’t want to be looked at as ‘weird’ and  because up until that point I felt like people needed to earn my trust or friendly demeanor.  My inner chatter told me that I have to put someone through the fire to share in my happiness and I had to struggle with them on almost every emotional realm before I could enjoy them.  Wow!  What was I thinking?

At the time, I was working at a bank in downtown Los Angeles.  On a daily basis, I came in contact with high profile persons with  only a short amount of time to do business.  They were usually very canalized with stern body language and no eye contact.  No matter how good of a work out at the gym I had the day before or the healthy meal I cooked the night before, after eight hours of discourteous interaction, I would behave the same way.  I would initiate road rage!  I created stress as soon as I left the office!  I would run to the elevator and stand by the control panel to be the first one out so I could beat the traffic coming out of the parking garage.  When I finally calmed down in the evening to write or bring out my creative side, it was time for me to go to bed and start the madness all over again.

the thief of truth

Dear Attachment,

You are the thief of truth. You pretend to make me strong when in actuality you supply me with debilitating thoughts. You cast my feet in promise with a mixture of rocks and mud and you tell me I am “where I’m suppose to be”. So I wave bye to love and water to remain the intelligence you have attached me to.

You are a thief that has labeled some of the most critical minds I know as “activists” when they are flesh and blood

You are a thief that has labeled some of the most creative minds I know as “poets” when they are artists

You are a thief that has labeled brown skinned women as “strong and fierce” when they are growing silently

Your understanding of me is just an illusion. I cannot stand in an understanding phase when it should be digested and turned into wisdom. I should flow. Attachment, you are a thief that has kept me stagnant and I now rebuke you.