about the ribbons

Maybe it’s not stating a prison number instead of your name
but for certain a wrist badge with your birthdate
and a, “tell us your full name please”
becomes your identity until salaries are paid.
Until bills are made and passed
to keep the torture going.
/ lobotomies remain a threat for those who imply an uprising
of thoughts

wp-1488396352266.jpeg

It’s ok girl,
You don’t have to join the ribbons just yet / if ever.
believe what you want
It’s ok girl,
You don’t have to play pretend they’re fundraising for a cure.
go on and be sugar cane
Let them know your sweetness is going to be hard to get
go and let them know  / you know
they got the cure
It’s hiding in the overhead coverages
of their non-profits
It’s ok curly/short haired girl,
show that drug infused swollen body
snap that thick neck and roll your eyes
go on and show them your scarred up chest
your burnt cleavage and peeling skin
show that radiation racing to your clavicle
the rawness under your breast
show how you still here  / cause like millions of others,
you tricked your body into dying to stay alive.
It’s ok girl,
You know the power of now
cause twice you had thoughts of tomorrow
being ok not to come
Naw, don’t be ashamed!
no time for that when the value of every second is gold.
when you were still granted a sunrise and a desk topped with
paper and pens

It’s ok if you don’t feel like pretending today.
If you don’t feel like walking with the crowd
cause you can’t keep up yet / shoes snug around freshly grown back toe nails
go on and sit .
think about things.
the words, will come to you as they always have.

You don’t have to join the ribbons just yet / if ever.

9 thoughts on “about the ribbons”

  1. This is such a beautiful write up! Beauty is not about how we look. It’s about the soul that can never be defined by the looks.
    Hope never dies.

  2. Hi Nikki – Thank you for this raw and beautiful piece. What you are going through isn’t about the ribbons and I’m glad you are honoring your personal truth above all else. “Naw, don’t be ashamed! No time for that when the value of every second is gold./when you were still granted a sunrise and a desk topped with/paper and pens” – I love this! Peace & blessings❣️

    1. Thank you. When I was going through chemo different groups and participation was really encouraged. I personally wasn’t comfortable with any of that. I’m allowing myself to work through what I feel without being informed from a group of people. Right now Sista, I’m angry. And I’m going to work through all of it and write it as I go along.

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