Breath and Sacrifice

Sunday – Wash clothes, wash hair, braid hair

Monday – Math Tutor

Tuesday  – West African Dance Class and Soccer Practice

Wednesday

Thursday – West African Dance Class and Soccer Practice

Friday

Saturday – Soccer Games

         pray.dream.hope.want.pray.laugh.dream.cry.yearn…  all fall in between the other days. 

 It has been four years since I took custody of my sisters children and moved my life from LA to ATL.  Right now I’m too exhausted to detail the differences between the two lifestyles, but they exist.  Dramatically. 

Where do I begin?  I am new everyday with challenges, fears and faith.  The boys are 19 and 14 and the girls 10, 7 and 6.  When I speak of becoming new, I am writing the dances of what to wear, how to speak, what’s the tone all in the note of love.  Love and care for them and where do I find the unselfish part of this parenting position.  They all made honor roll, made the traveling squad for dance and the traveling team for soccer… not too shabby for a chic who is an independent artist.  A chic who went from 0 kids to 5 kids in 32 hours of driving.

 Sacrifice has always been my breath as an artist.  For the love of receiving the stories and words, silence and solitude was the recipe.  I always dated and loved but a perfectionist at remaining detached was my sacrifice.  Not just mine, not a new decision and not even conscious… something that just was.  Now my sacrifice is the children and they are my breath.

             I miss my art.  I miss my muse.  Send her to me.  Tell her,  I am available June 16th…  

SUMMER TIME and the kids are gone for four weeks!  I made a SUMMER BUCKET LIST and plan to become selfish and hear myself talk again!

 I look forward to writing and growing as My person.  As an artist.  And becoming a better Aunt for my nieces and nephews when they return. 

 I haven’t been this excited about school being out since my junior year in high school!

Sunday – me

Monday – me

Tuesday – me

Wednesday – me again

Thursday – guess who? me

Friday – yep, me!

Saturday – If  I’m happy, everyone in my house will be, so… ME

2 thoughts on “Breath and Sacrifice”

  1. Nikki, I only have 2 little people but I completely understand. We make the children our first priority. I think of everything that I do for them and with them as an investment, one that I pray with yield HIGH returns. I am just now realizing though, that I must schedule ME time because its my time to rejuvenate myself so that I can continue to plant the seeds for my harvest!
    P.S. I think what you have done for your family is simply wonderful!

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